{31 Days} Day 19: Finding Yourself

Monday, October 28, 2013

Hello, lovelies - I have another guest post for you today. My beautiful dear friend Caitlin, whom I'm so blessed to know in real life at college, blogs over at Beauties, Bliss, and Bears...Oh My! and yesterday, she wrote an incredibly raw, real post that is so beautiful and true. 

I loved it so much I asked her if I could share it on here, especially since it is about us as women and as bloggers/blog readers. I definitely can relate to what she writes about, especially this summer, when I shared about my recent weight gain. 

Enjoy her lovely words and then pop over to her blog to leave her some love + follow her posts. 


I woke up this morning craving spaghetti. Spaghetti and coffee to be exact. 
However, out of laziness I opted for a quesadilla and cup of overly sweetened Jo...I should have known then and there that this day was going to go nowhere. I sat there eating my odd choice of breakfast food while catching up on some blog reading...And it was nice...but something that I had been mulling over the past couple of days in my anything but average mind crept back into view,

As of late I feel as if I hadn't been myself... and let me tell you that is a horrible place to be. I came to a slow realization of this, and today I think I subconsciously chose to remedy it. The blogging world is wonderful, but underneath all the "genuine" posts that are intended to provide some sort of answers to questions, that we as readers may have concerning a certain topic, there is something else at work. I hadn't really noticed it making an appearance in my life, until recently. 

See, when we open ourselves up to the blogging world we have the option to choose how we come across. "But don't paint me like the good guy because every I time I write I get to choose the angle that you view me and select the nicest light" (Watsky) Those words had never had such relevance. When was the last time you saw someone post their bad hair day? Or pictures of them in anything less than their best?

Now don't get me wrong, I understand why we do this. Why would we want to put something out there that we could be criticized for? We seek to be loved. Plain and simple. We put the best version of ourselves out there and pray that people acknowledge just how awesome we are. We hide behind these images and take on personas that never should have belonged to us in the first place. And that is what I mean by saying I haven't been myself.

When I read through blogs... I get the notion that I am not quite enough. That I'm not beautiful unless I contour my face this way, or unless my hair falls perfectly every single stupid day. I find new tips to make myself more attractive, and by golly I hop on them without a second thought because as I've learned from reading, I obviously haven't reached perfection yet. And it is exhausting. Yesterday I looked incredibly good, and I felt as if I almost achieved a look many of my favorite bloggers would be proud of, but I also had a ridiculous amount of make-up on. 

It was so heavy and I felt tired all day, and I think that is when I began to realize I wasn't the Caitlin I once knew.

So here I am.

 Hair still wet from my shower, and nothing gracing my skin except for a bit of moisturizer and some acne medication for this mountainous pimple smack dab in the middle of my forehead. 

But holy nonsense am I beautiful, and I mean that in the least vain way possible.

 Seeing myself for the first time in who knows how long, in my own skin is so refreshing and I feel awesome. I'm getting nothing accomplished, and I'm eating my weight in food, but LA-DEE-DA, I could honestly care less. Today, I am not shaking hands and making plans. Today, I'm going back to my roots and taking in the Caitlin that has been absent for far too long, and putting away the guise that I had come to accept as myself.

Today you are you, 
that is truer than true.
 There is no one alive that is youer than you. 
~Dr. Seuss

Come to think of it, that is one heck of an accomplishment. I am me, and I am breaking every single rule I had put in place for myself over the past couple of months, and I'm rocking it. So it turns out this day has not been in vain after all.

I am Caitlin Kline and this is Walter the Poisonous Water Buffalo and we approve of this message. 

Moral of the story: spaghetti and coffee can do a whole lotta good in your life. 


This is part of my 31 Days series - read more here.

Photo credit: first two pictures c/o Grace Dalton, last picture c/o Caitlin Kline


  1. I'm so very glad that you enjoyed the post! Thank you for sharing it love:)

    1. Thank you for allowing me to share it! It was so beautiful. <3